drugstore perfume.

this song is imprinted in my brain. well, after listening to it over and over almost every single day ever since "Hesitant Alien" came out, and singing to it while waiting on jeeps or looking out windows, it would be no wonder why this song resonates so well with me.

but then again, it's more than that. this song speaks to me because i feel that this song is about me. i mean yes, it could possibly be a song about a prostitute or a club-hopper, but it says what i've always wanted to say.

that she can change for love

and she explains how long she's waited for

she wanted more

in recent days, i've come to the conclusion that yes, i am suffering from depression. but i know that depression is a mindset--not an illness. and even if it really were an illness, it can be countered--not through drugs or through straitjackets, but through love.

and that song is just with me wherever i go. i can't shut it off or shoo it away. somehow the song has said everything i've ever wanted to say, and anyone who would really want to know who i am could just listen to this song, and hopefully go, "so that's who she is."

and maybe someday, someone would say, "i get it now."

--

i'm now writing a story based off this song, and under the same name. it's about a postal worker named Dave who meets a city girl named Meg. i just started last night, and i'm already at 842 words.

also it may or may not have an atomic bomb in it.